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Permanent stress from fear of commitment

I had a relationship where she lived on the other side of the country and we saw each other in the weekends, or sometimes every other weekend.

Despite the fact that she lived so far away, I still felt suffocated and did not feel any space.

For almost a year I had permanent stress. When I woke up I felt for a moment no stress and then the stress came (from the relationship). Because I did not want to hurt her, I did not end the relationship and I stayed in it. I did not feel the power or the freedom to step out. It felt like I was drowning in an ocean.

Obviously also the quality of the relationship got worse. Luckily she ended the relation and I was free again. Even after it ended, I felt the permanent stress for almost a year.


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