I miss my mother

I miss my mother

When my mother died I felt immensely sad. I still cannot say that time heals, when I think about my mother and how she fought her disease and how we found her... I get the shivers.

I feel the need to talk, but I have the idea that the people around me do not share that need or even avoid me. Maybe they are afraid I get emotional. Sometimes that is so, but not always.

So I cry secretly, alone. When I do that, I can relax again.

I feel I miss her in my whole body. Sometimes I don´t know how I can do without her.
And other moments I feel fine, because I know that she is proud of me and how I am doing.

I would like to feel more joy again, but there are so many things that remind me of her.